Hurtling through the black abyss which seems to be a forgotten path to an unknown place, he went beyond, what remained of the little sparks of streetlights. Deeper he went silent and darker the surroundings became, but his mind raged, and heart was also racing to catch up. “This world is mad, its people are mad, must escape” he kept repeating. His conscious self was waging a war to hold on to the last ounce of sanity that was left. “Sanity” he thought with contempt, “Why be sane in this mad world!”

Work, home, workouts, weekends, life has been going round in the same circle for a while but the world around him was blooming with news every day. News on assaults, cheats, murders, what not! Cutting off the news channels and newspaper helped at first, but not for long. Starving half dead forms by the roadside, lust filled pervert eyes on buses, smacking hands blinded by ego and greed, hate mongers, all were too much to tolerate. World was being engulfed in absolute selfishness with people shrinking to just themselves. He had to get away and find peace, he was ready to run to the very end until he can close his eyes to a moment of serenity.

But there were only so much his weary legs could carry him. He was tired and paused to rest. Suddenly from the depth of the night, he heard a laboured breathing. His eyes fell upon a form which was barely human.

The man (or so he assumed) was sitting beneath a tree and had his eyes half closed. His limbs were reduced to just skin and bones. Tattered clothes, locked hair and hunched posture suggested a ‘Bhikshu’, but most peculiar was a hole or rather a small pit on his forehead, a remanent of a past wound, he assumed. Despite the looks, there was something holy about the man which he couldn’t quite place.

Awakened as if by the piercing stare, the man opened his eyes and spoke “It is I, Ashwathama, the bearer of sins”

Hi thoughts flooded with his paatti’s voice “and thus, having sinned incomparably by directing his wrath towards an unborn life, Ashwathama was cursed for 3000 years of penance by Lord Krishna, deprived of his source of power, the mighty gem in the forehead, he was to wander along this earth carrying sins one and all”. ‘That explains the mark on his forehead’, he thought.

When he spoke, he spoke with full conviction, “You do not have to hide away from the world, you may just walk among the crowd and will not be noticed. All have their fair share of sins.”

To this, Ashwathama replied, “I carry in me such repentance that the world would be filled with guilt and heads would weigh down in shame forever; I carry such rage in me that the world would be burnt to ashes; I carry such grief in me that the world would forget to smile again. I carry hatred so deep that the even a drop of love cannot penetrate. I am here for you to unburden, not to spread around. Do you not realise what these feelings have done to me? Its eating me from inside. I am cursed, but this is my path to salvation. I am, but a blessing to your world. Your world, maybe wrong, but remember, you are a part of it, there is no denying that.”

“The path is yours to choose. If you step beyond this point, the forest will swamp you and drain out the last of life essence until pure evil remains, which shall go into me ultimately. Be known, the world will never be at peace, free of suffering, that is heaven you are thinking about. But you can find peace within you and within the people around you. You have the freedom to let go of your burden here, with me and return a sane man, ambassador to love, compassion and kindness, which is what your world needs the most now. Be a warrior in the forefront or be a martyr who died without taking the sword, the choice is yours.”

What path did he take, alas that is a story for another time.